This transformation of emotion can cause a spike in erotic energy, creating a powerful effect.”īefore we continue, a quick lesson in gay history. “Depending on the environment, cruising can be about the chase, or the variation of emotional transformation from ambivalence to resolution (for example: being confused and experiencing anxiety regarding their interest, to clarity and excitement in finding out they desire you). It’s taboo, and the risk of getting caught and/or watched can really charge folks’ erotic energy,” licensed therapist, Todd Baratz, tells Grindr. It was one of the best sexual experiences he’d ever had in his life, and it might not have happened if it weren’t for the pandemic. Three loads later, Cameron felt satisfied and left the park, taking one last load before heading home. “He fucked me until he came and much to my pleasure another guy quickly took his place.” “Eventually, I got tired of kneeling, so I stood up and made my way over to a tree, motioning to one of the guys in the group,” Cameron continues. After a couple minutes, one of the men slipped his shorts off and began fingering him. His boldness attracted attention, and soon 10 men swarmed around Cameron, each waiting for their turn. “As soon as I got there I set my sights on a handsome guy stroking his dick and dropped to my knees and started sucking him off.” “This time, I knew what I wanted, and I intended to get it,” he shares. A decision he regretted.Ī few days later, Cameron returned to the location, this time wearing his favorite jockstrap and a pair of tight-fitting shorts. After wandering aimlessly for half an hour, he happened upon a circle jerk, but was too afraid to join. Through the app, he’d heard that the Ramble section of Central Park was a popular place to cruise and decided to check it out one evening. Some, like Cameron, 24, found Twitter particularly useful.
![older gay men cruising for sex older gay men cruising for sex](https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/g9IAAMXQdm5Q-KYx/s-l400.jpg)
Most of the people I spoke with said they’ve been using apps and websites like Squirt (which has its own Cruise feature), Sniffies (a website specifically for cruising) and Grindr to find the cruisiest areas nearby. “Before we did it I thought it would be weird and creepy but it was actually kind of hot.” “I was chatting with a guy who really wanted to hook up, so he begged to peek in my window and watch me jerk off on my bed, so I let him, and he played with himself outside and came on my window,” says Jesse, 33. However, the city (Toronto) took notice and either closed them entirely, or reduced the hours and increased security.”įor some, cruising is still too risky, so they get creative. “With all the closures and restrictions on indoor spaces (combined with the colder weather), friends of mine have noticed a resurgence of cruising in washrooms. “Cruising already has a risk to it and the fact that we're in a pandemic has added to that risk, but behaviors really haven’t changed much,” Jakes observes. “Cruising offers the opportunity to have physical connection, but from a distance, so it’s a perfect fit for the current pandemic situation.” “I think that there’s fatigue in the social and physical distancing,” sex and relationship therapist, Dr.
#OLDER GAY MEN CRUISING FOR SEX FULL#
Given that we’re now a full year into the pandemic (can you believe it’s been a fucking year?!), there’s been a notable resurgence in the classic act of cruising. Not the craziest cruising story in the world, but we did watch Cruising (1980)-a film starring Al Pacino that’s been largely scrutinized for stigmatizing gay men-later that night. I don’t know if it was overexcitement or overstimulation but I wasn’t ready yet. As the figure drew closer, I pulled my pants up. I’d only been out of the closet for a few short months and this was like nothing I’d ever known.Īs soon as we spotted somebody in the distance, he excitedly dropped to his knees, pulled down my pants and started sucking my cock.
![older gay men cruising for sex older gay men cruising for sex](https://static01.nyt.com/images/2012/09/14/nyregion/RAMBLE/RAMBLE-superJumbo.jpg)
My arms were crossed the entire time, something I often do when I’m uncomfortable. He took my hand as I exited the car, and then led me into a dense forest laced with skinny trails pointing in every direction. I was excited, but also incredibly nervous.
![older gay men cruising for sex older gay men cruising for sex](https://www.w3sauna.co.uk/images/W3_Website_sauna.png)
My heart was pounding through my chest when we pulled up to the hill.
![older gay men cruising for sex older gay men cruising for sex](https://www.outtraveler.com/sites/default/files/2016/01/28/firstGayCruise_introx633.jpg)
The first man I dated out of the closet was older than me, and took it upon himself to give me a lesson in gay culture by taking me to a popular cruising spot in the middle of the night. But then again, I came out in the era of Grindr, where dick is delivered to your door quicker than pizza. Admittedly, my experience with cruising is limited.